Over at playdate they are having a little contest. They want assvice (or advice) for Her Bad Mother, Mrs. Chicken and Chicky Chicky Baby before they all birth their second babies.
I only have one, so how can I offer them advice?
I am a weenie, I am NEVER AGAIN HAVING ANOTHER HUMAN COME OUT OF MY VAGINA. I made sure of that by having the Essure procedure done 3 years ago. Maybe though, thinking a little there are some things that I could have done differently when Bacon Bits was a baby that would have helped me keep my sanity in check a lot sooner.
Here is the ASSVICE from me, Faith, the Momma of Momma's Tantrum on what I would do differently this time around if Bacon Bits was a wee little squishy baby.
1) I would ask for more help. I didn't do this at all, because we were really far away from family and while we are friends with our neighbors I didn't want to IMPOSE. Looking back, even just asking one of them over to have coffee would have helped me and them.
2) It is okay if everything isn't perfect while they are babies. They don't remember anything until they are like almost 3 so who cares if the dishes are dirty or you wear sweats for a week? (Okay, don't wear the SAME sweats for a week, but you know what I mean.) Stressing out about having a perfect house, and a perfect baby leaves you zero time for you to sleep. WHICH IS WHAT YOU NEED, to recover from growing a LIFE for like 9 months, and then feeding and nourishing it.
3) Love yourself and your husband. I know it's hard to do, because they are always "ME, ME, ME!"
4) If they get to be to grabby assed with you say "Hey!! I need 30 minutes ALONE." Never say "Mommy needs." Always say "I need." Don't loose yourself in the mommy. Just because you are a mommy doesn't mean you aren't you. Hopefully by starting this early enough you will be able to get longer periods in as the kids get older.
Good luck with those squishy not so little babies that will be here soon. I know you can't wait for them to "JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF THE MOM CONDO ALREADY" then life as you know it will be back to sleepless nights and "What were we thinking?"
All too soon though, all of these not so little boy and girl babies will be having babies of their own, and we all will be wondering where all of the time has gone!!
Here is the ASSVICE from me, Faith, the Momma of Momma's Tantrum on what I would do differently this time around if Bacon Bits was a wee little squishy baby.
1) I would ask for more help. I didn't do this at all, because we were really far away from family and while we are friends with our neighbors I didn't want to IMPOSE. Looking back, even just asking one of them over to have coffee would have helped me and them.
2) It is okay if everything isn't perfect while they are babies. They don't remember anything until they are like almost 3 so who cares if the dishes are dirty or you wear sweats for a week? (Okay, don't wear the SAME sweats for a week, but you know what I mean.) Stressing out about having a perfect house, and a perfect baby leaves you zero time for you to sleep. WHICH IS WHAT YOU NEED, to recover from growing a LIFE for like 9 months, and then feeding and nourishing it.
3) Love yourself and your husband. I know it's hard to do, because they are always "ME, ME, ME!"
4) If they get to be to grabby assed with you say "Hey!! I need 30 minutes ALONE." Never say "Mommy needs." Always say "I need." Don't loose yourself in the mommy. Just because you are a mommy doesn't mean you aren't you. Hopefully by starting this early enough you will be able to get longer periods in as the kids get older.
Good luck with those squishy not so little babies that will be here soon. I know you can't wait for them to "JUST GET THE HELL OUT OF THE MOM CONDO ALREADY" then life as you know it will be back to sleepless nights and "What were we thinking?"
All too soon though, all of these not so little boy and girl babies will be having babies of their own, and we all will be wondering where all of the time has gone!!
7 comments:
I'm with you. I have one so who am I to give advice, but I do hope to have another b/c at my advanced age I'm a little crazy. :) And I had a very enjoyable c-section so I never ever had to endure labor. And I don't care what anyone says a c-section is where it's at! I would say I need to chill more post birth. I was way too OCD and needing things in order.
Good advice, Faith. I'd love to play but am not sure I have any advice AT ALL - I've thought about it, but really I don't have anything helpful to offer. My best advice would be to start blogging but those lovely ladies were on to that long before I was!
Re: number 2? I have been wearing sweatpants every day for MONTHS now, so. That one shouldn't be too hard to cover. ;)
Thanks for participating!
Wait. Everything doesn't have to be perfect??? Sure, now you tell me. ;)
Thanks for the advice!
Good advice, especially numbers 3 and 4. That really is so important and too often it's lost in the chaos.
I really like No. 4. I say "Mommy" all the time when I should say "I." Thanks for all the great advice!
Does this mean that you're going to get your ass down here to help me with my 2nd????????
(p.s. please remember that this is coming from a HUGELY pregnant woman who has been your best friend since forever!!!!!)
Signe
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